Why I plan on never getting married or having children: and why that's okay.

First of all, I'm not anti-marriage.

My parents have been married for almost 25 years and fall more and more in love with each other everyday. Which as a kid I thought was really gross. I've had great role models for what loving marriages look like, and I've seen some amazing people love each other through thick and thin.

My parents when they were dating

But to be realistic, there are risks in a marriage. Wonderful things often mean taking risks, and in the United States 51% of all marriages fail. I'm not saying a divorce is a failure, in fact, if you have a child, pet, or home you love very much because of a relationship with someone you loved, isn't that in itself a victory? I'm just generally not willing to take a risk. That's just who I am as a person.

So the reason for the drastic stance on marriage and children is this: If I plan on falling in love and it doesn't happen then I will be disappointed, but if I plan on living my life as a fulfilled single person with her own goals and aspirations then its a surprise.

Second of all, I wouldn't want children unless I could ensure I could raise them in an equally supportive or more supportive environment than the one I was raised in. My parents are amazing people and they waited 5 years after they got married to have kids so they could support me the way they wanted to.

It's really not anyone's business what I plan on doing for the rest of my life. But just for argument's sake, I would like to be a sports agent. I want to legally represent athletes in contracts, and maybe give female professional athletes an advocate for pay that they deserve for playing like a girl. I want to maybe be the fun auntie at family functions and I want to get a degree and have a cool loft apartment in a major city and go out to new restaurants and be busy.

I didn't hear wife or mother in that, do you? Sure not everything will go as planned, and maybe I'll fall in love and have a mini-Emily or two. Right now I'm not studying to be a mom or wife. Right now I'm studying in business school to get a career. If I'm a mom or wife eventually great, that's fine, but not now (or soon). Anything else will be a bonus, a surprise, a treat. I'm working for things within my own control.

For some reason, at 19 I am already questioned about my love life incessantly, which is comical at this point. I'm doing well in school, succeeding in my writing and working on getting myself back in shape. But have I met any nice boys lately?

Conversations with some people in my family are going to be interesting for me now, "You'll change your mind!" or "Ah, but you're young, you'll want kids later."

I'm pretty sure I won't thank you very much. Im planning and working for what I want right now. A person's twenties seem so important to laying out what you want. School, Internships, networking and building resume after resume. Time is crucial.

I don't want children, and I don't want a husband, I want a life. If my life all of a sudden has one or both of those things in them then great, but right now, as I sit here scheduling my next semester's classes, that's not really in the cards for me right now. Quite frankly, I'm not planning on getting my hopes up.